September 23rd 2006 | Permalink

My mind seems to be walking through fog. I can't get my ideas in order.

Yesterday, I heard of an out-of-the-ordinary concert, more like an educational concert for kids adapted to a more mature audience. Still, there where many kids in the theater. I haven't gone to the theater in a long time, it seems like ages. When was the last concert I went to? 3 or 4 months ago?

It was a humid night, bustling, noisy. My mind was OK back then. People flocked at the entrance, having their tickets torn as they went through. I met a friend of mine outside, said hello to her and walked around the main facade. Later I went inside, had my ticket torn apart by a lady of the theater's crew, got a brochure and walked upstairs to enter the theater's main room.

It was cold, bright and very noisy. I walked among cables and crew members of the state's public television service. I noticed I was in the way, so I kept on walking, dodging power cables in my way. Then, in the distance, I saw my friend, sitting around many other persons; kids, adolescents, adults, seniors. Probably about 60 humans in my field of view. I felt vulnerable, and tried to keep my cool. I walked upstairs some more.

I have a headache...

Finally, we managed to get some space for me. I sat down and saluted my friend's friends. Tomodachi no tomodachi. He introduced me to his friends, which attend the same music school as he does. Cool people, a great sense of musical nature and an amazing spirit. I have never seen people so enthusiastic in such a long time! I am such an loser...

The oboe played A, followed by other instruments tuning. I love that noise, the least painful of all noises, the cello's strings vibrating and the contrabass' rough sounds. Silence. The musicians ready themselves as the young, somewhat unexperienced, conductor lifted his arms to begin the piece. Hundreds of eyes focused on the conductor, breathing halted. All was quiet between the stage and the audience.

And the first notes began to be played. They just appeared as if they were already in the air.

...

Did you cry? I was asked. Firstly, I wasn't sure what she meant by that.
I looked at her eyes, humid. Then my friends', reddish. What had just happened, right now?
I probed my eyes too. They where also wet.
She asked her friends too, some said they did, some said they didn't.
Why did our eyes become humid? What just made our eyes become full of sorrow? The contrasting light before us? The cold air coming from the humming air-conditioning system? The flashing lights from the silver-cromed flute? There was one thing. It went through me. Like air, like water. It caught me and everyone of us, entangled our bodies with a power so great that our own spirits would become britle from so much wear and tear. I had not sensed it until afterwards, as the young adolescent rested on the chair, with weary eyes, yet with a highly skilled sense of hearing. I dared not to look at her, but at the very end of my field of view, there she was, resting, as if sleeping, next to me. What was I thinking? I just listened to the music. And then it hit me, as if I had just walked into a brick wall. I observed the abstract figure before me, flowing through everything like a fluid, making the whole theater vibrate in total synchronization. What was it? It was energy. Sound!! But how could that cause such an emotional effect on us? I wasn't paying attention, and seemed to seldomly have.

I always observed music as an object, with form, color, texture and smell. But I never really analyzed it with other objects. It vibrated, it hummed, it jumped and hissed. It spoke a language we can't understand conscioussly. But, on the other hand, we do understand what it tries to express, unconscioussly. That part of my self which I don't visit ocassionally punched me in the face, and I never saw it coming. Music is like poetry, with words, just with a different interface and ideological representation. That is how I should listen to music. Not as noise, but as words.

Sorrow filled our eyes as the pubert played swiftly through the piano keys, her hands moving with ease and haste. Sorrow filled our eyes as the pubert played swiftly through the piano, his hands sensing the piano keys; seeing nothing, yet hearing an enormous universe surrounding him. Sorrow filled our eyes as the young adult played swiftly with the silver-cromed flute, breathing in and out as if she were dancing along with the music.

...

Applause. We all cheerfuly clapped our hands in unison to thank our fellow musicians. The air becoming warm, as people cheered and smiled as the 3 young musicians bowed.

Then, the lights were turned on. People got up from their seats and walked downstairs to the lobby. I standed near my new acquaintances, not knowing whether to follow them or to walk across the stage and walk to the parking lot. And then, my body trembled. I noticed it. There was a flow of adrenalin in my blood. What happened? Why did my body suddenly become so tense, like if I were standing under a building being demolished before me? What did the Firebird do to knock the building off the ground and hurl it to me. Catch! it ordered.

I said goodbye to my friends, and walked away, to the parking lot. The air had cooled down. It was near midnight, and the city was still alive. The light from it colored the sky with an orange color. Where had the stars gone? Where did everything go? Was there anything beyond this city, anyway?

Awestruck from the girl's sensibility, I plugged an apparatus to my ears, and heard a whole new universe revolving around me.


Thanks León, Leonore, Mónica and the rest of the gang. You have totally changed my life.

-I promise I will put more pictures on this post!-